Bowen Therapy and the Art of Equal and Opposite Pressure

This is my third blog on the subject of touch and this time I’m bringing it back to my Bowen practise and the different ways touch is used to encourage relaxation and change.

Sadly, I have attended my fair share of funerals this year. It’s probably got something to do with my age but the temporal nature of existence and the fragility of life has presented itself to me in high technicolour definition in 2024. What I assumed was solid six months ago feels far more tenuous now and whilst I try and maintain a sense of curiosity around these new thoughts and feelings and focus on the bigger picture, I find myself more distracted than normal, anxious in a way I am unfamiliar with, confidence knocked and super sensitive to the nature and quality of my relationships, whether that be with my husband and daughter, my friends, my fitness instructor, or the person behind me in the queue at the post office. I suspect this is why the topic of touch has become such a preoccupation of mine…….

Ferdinand Hodler (1853–1918), Valentine Godé-Darel One Day Before Her Death (1915), oil on canvas,

When you attend a memorial service you see and experience a whole spectrum of hands-on gestures/touches; I think it’s something to do with the very personal nature of grief and the fact that whilst the focus is on one person, each friend and family member, colleague, friend of the family and distant relation arrives at a funeral with very different and sometimes contradictory experiences and memories of the deceased. There is such a diversity of feeling, need and relationship at these events and one of the most common ways in which we negotiate our way though the experience and mourn our sense of loss is by reaching out with sympathetic looks, gentle words and touch. For some people any form of touch, even a look, is too much (perhaps their emotions are just too close to the surface for public exposure and contact of any sort makes them feel deeply uncomfortable and vulnerable). For others it’s a smile and a soft rub on the back or a squeeze of the hand that gives comfort and consolation. And then in other cases a massive bear hug is what is most needed and appreciated. The lesson for me from all of this, is that one size does not fit all ,that every touch puts us in relationship with another and there is both the sensitivity of the recipient as well as the giver to be considered. Ideally of course the touch we give and the touch we receive in these moments and more generally, are compatible and mutual compassion and healing can take place.

This brings me to Bowen. This hands on therapy is commonly described as light touch and whilst I agree with this in principle,  I also find the description somewhat misleading. I’m concerned it over simplifies and diminishes the skills of Bowen practitioners and does not help explain how or why  a treatment works.  Instead of emphasising the ‘light’ side of the therapy I’d like to go back to my student days and the way in which the Bowen move was (and still is) explained and taught. The phrase that is used by many teachers and practitioners to describe the particular quality, depth and intensity of touch is  “equal and opposite pressure”. To get a sense of what this means find a partner, stand opposite one another and meet each other with the palms of one hand. Try and move the hands together without pushing into or pulling away from each other, all the time maintaining contact.

When we find the sweet spot where there is neither confrontation nor recoil, we increase the likelihood that the other person will feel grounded, safe and relaxed, more able to listen, and better able to comprehend directions and assimilate information. When people in our care feel less defensive and loosen their grip on their pain and discomfort it follows that the possibility for  healing, repair and change increases.

For those of you familiar with martial arts, it’s not dissimilar to the tai chi practise of push hands, a two person routine that helps students understand correct posture and alignment, correct use of internal and external strength and balance in movement. At a deeper level push hands is about learning and mastering the four main energies of tai chi, that is, listening, understanding, neutralising (following the force) and issuing (releasing power).

If we return to the observations made at the funeral however, we realise that equal and opposite pressure is not the same for everyone and can change in different circumstances and times of life. So whilst the lightest of touches may be the most appropriate course of action with John who comes to me with a newly broken ankle, or Emily, the 4 week baby with colic, a firmer, more resolute Bowen treatment may be more appropriate for gospel singing, swinging Suzy or the local rugby team. This doesn’t mean I am advocating for the kind of depth that creates a pain response from the nervous system…it’s always about keeping the clients in that rest, digest and repair zone. Nonetheless, the more I practise Bowen the more I recognise the importance of meeting my clients (family, friends, colleagues) where they are at that given moment and that means listening and observing with all my senses and developing a touch that is finely tuned, discerning and in synchronicity with my clients needs.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this blog. Please sign up to my mailing list if you’d like to keep in touch with  future blogs and courses and events I am running. I’ll be back after summer with another. Just a heads up though…my only child is off to uni in London in September so I might still be a bit shaky!! I’m going to miss the sound of her singing and playing piano so much…….